Wake Up
by LeaXIII
Summary: "Am I...dead?" Jay closed his eyes, listening to his heartbeat; he inhaled, breathing in the earthy, springlike air. He still felt very much alive. Was this the afterlife? (Spoilers for Entry 80!)


_Wake up._

The voice seemed to come from nowhere, yet it echoed in Jay's head, warping and distorting into a strange rhythm that threatened to lull him back into the darkness. The words echoed again, louder this time, until they faded into a steady heartbeat.

Slowly, Jay became aware of his own consciousness. Slowly, he realized that the heartbeat was his own.

Jay's eyes fluttered open. He didn't dare move, not yet. His vision was bleary, like he'd just been shaken from a deep sleep; it took several seconds for the green blurs in front of his eyes to form into short blades of grass, wavering slightly in the gentle breeze that ruffled his hair. The feeling was so comforting that Jay was tempted to just close his eyes and succumb to the darkness once more, but the words echoing through his very being, pressing at the edges of his awareness, were impossible to ignore.

The steady beat of his own heart finally forced Jay to push himself up into a sitting position. Groggily, he brought a hand to his neck, just to ensure that the pulse was actually his own. It almost felt much too intense to be real; he could feel the steady beat resounding through every nerve ending in his body, he could feel the blood pushing through his veins, all the way to the tips of his toes and back again. The feeling overwhelmed his senses for a moment, and Jay closed his eyes, willing himself to breathe slowly against the odd sensation. It didn't hurt; it wasn't pain, exactly, but something else, something on the razor-sharp edge between pain and pleasure, something impossible to describe with words.

_Wait...pain... _

Jay's hand flew to his chest, his pulse racing faster in his ears. He let out a choked scream as shards of broken memories suddenly dragged their way through his mind, much too fast for him to piece together. He could only catch brief glimpses, like a drowning man struggling for fleeting gasps of air. He saw cameras, and roads, and tall, empty buildings. He saw dusty hallways, and dim basements, and dark blood on his own shaking hand. He saw Tim, and Alex, and that mysterious person in the hoodie.

He saw that _thing_.

A deafening gunshot rang in his ears, threatening to shatter him into a million tiny pieces.

Jay flinched as he fell on his back, his eyes snapping open to see nothing but the clear blue sky above.

Struggling to catch his breath, Jay grasped at the grass around him; he needed something to hold onto, something to tell him that this was _real_. He suddenly realized that his right hand was still clutching his chest, right where the gunshot wound should have been. He patted at the area and lifted his hand to look at it.

No blood. No wound. He was healed.

_But...I _did_ get shot. Alex shot me. _

Jay glanced around apprehensively.

_Am I...dead? _

He closed his eyes again, listening to his heartbeat, which was beginning to slow down, back to a normal rate. He inhaled, breathing in the earthy, springlike air. He still _felt_ very much alive. Was this the afterlife?

Jay shifted, suddenly realizing how uncomfortable he was. The back of his jacket felt folded into an awkward position, as if he was laying on one of his arms. He fidgeted again before finally sitting up and shrugging the stupid thing off of his shoulders, craning his neck to look over his shoulder, trying to figure out just what the hell was making it so impossible to find a comfortable position.

He froze.

_Huh. That's...new. _

Blinking slowly, Jay briefly wondered whether the silvery-blue wings folded behind him might just be some weird optical illusion. But no, he could feel them, two strange new limbs between his shoulder blades, the feathers fluttering slightly with every beat of his heart.

Carefully, he stood, reaching across his body to grab the top of the left wing with his right hand. He pulled it open slowly, noting which new muscles moved as he did so, and as he turned his attention to the other wing, he found that he could extend it without really thinking about it. The sensation was completely foreign; it was like he was learning to walk all over again.

Jay tentatively folded and extended his wings a few more times, trying to take mental notes, hoping the process would allow him to learn how to move them just as easily as lifting a hand. Fortunately, some kind of muscle memory seemed to take over, and Jay decided to stop questioning _why_ this was all coming so naturally to him.

_Okay...flap_, he thought, as if he could simply order around whatever part of his brain was in charge of these new wings. It seemed to work; with a few quick, heavy flaps, stirring the grass beneath his feet, Jay lifted himself off of the ground.

Throwing his arms out to either side of himself for balance, Jay couldn't suppress the grin that spread across his face at his newfound ability. He was flying, actually _flying_! He laughed, distantly pondering the last time he'd heard the sound of his own laughter, and concentrated on gaining more altitude. Fortunately, his wings were strong; they didn't seem to tire easily, and keeping his rather meager weight off the ground came quite naturally. Soon, Jay was soaring high above the green meadow, away from the tangle of trees behind him.

He found himself briefly contemplating whether this might all be some kind of elaborate hallucination.

But as he closed his eyes and drank in the moment, feeling the wind rushing past his face, he decided that he couldn't bring himself to care anymore.


End file.
